Author: jennthompson

like an emotional or spiritual or mental one you mean?
(as though anyone will answer that question)

i think so …
when i first was battling the system to get an assessment for Hunter, I lost my everloving mind. for real. i had a nervous breakdown. only it didn’t happen quickly, like the way people describe it as a psychological event, i didn’t suddenly just snap. i spent almost 2 years watching everything i had believe in, worked for, learned and loved be torn slowly away. it was a slow process of sinking into insanity, with serious sleep deprivation involved. and the screaming. my god, i will never forget the screaming. the shrill, pained scream of a tiny infant that went on and on and on and on.

and then, later, after advocacy when the realization that so many i had been trying to help were users. abusers. neglectful. and, in the most extreme cases, were ableists themselves. i lost my faith for a bit, or suffered a crisis of faith, or was angry at god … whatever you want to call it. i hit a wall of spiritual burnout. the realization came, later, that it didn’t matter if the parents were sociopaths … the kids still deserve help.

i have hit walls of burnout. as a mom. as a lover. as a caregiver. i wind up refilling my well by leaning harder into my faith at those times. i push heavily into god. and i give up all my thoughts of having any control or power over anything to theUniverse. and i am refilled. and i can rise again and again and continue on in this fashion forever.

no way. there is no such thing as too much information.

i have always identified with JohnnyFive. Need. More. Input.

i prefer to multitask. i like to get lots done at once. it makes me feel so much more productive.

i always have lots going on. and i like it.

idle hands, so they say…

and i prefer my hands to keep working, endlessly, and hopefully for the good of the gods.

Not hard. For the most part.

I took some assertiveness classes through my counselling a few years ago and it was one of the best things I have ever learned.

It was, quite literally, the gift that keeps on giving.

it depends on the distraction.

i can maintain clear focus or refocus for almost any distraction … except my children.

they spin me in circles.

it is vital. and, for some, takes a long time to learn.

i try to not only fill my children’s cups but to also show them that i also fill my own so they will know the importance of also putting themselves first when it matters and take forward an understanding and innate belief that they are loved and lovable.

i wonder, often, if we haven’t lost sight of real love. agape love. not just love of things or attention or lust. but real love. the kind that does good and is good and freely given and freely received.

that agape love … it should start within, for and to ones self.

apparently really well. except for the whole failing heart thing.

the steam engine.

i get up right awayish. i look at my memories first. then i get up. and stretch and get on with my day

analog